— gabagools —

To those who paid me a personal visit in the parlor, I know I promised any favor on the day of my daughter’s wedding. See my responses below.

  • Don Francisco, I can read your screenplay but I can’t give notes.
  • Ricardo, you can borrow it, but I’ll need it back in time for Halloween.
  • Roberto, I can give a soft yes but I’ll need to check with my podiatrist first.
  • Dario, yes I do know Jane Fonda but frankly I’m uncomfortable passing that on.
  • Little Martin, my sincere apologies but I forgot your question. Also, I broke your air fryer.
  • Johnny Boy, my answer is yes. Always. But not on the Sabbath.
  • Stefano, I think you have the wrong guy. You want Don Mattingly.
  • Carmela, I’d love to help but I’m banned from practicing dentistry in this state.
  • And Frank, for the last time, I’m not beating up Mr. Allen for you. That creep is like, five-six. Do it yourself.
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