Mike Reiss

The Who-S-of-A was a wonderful place

Where people were kind (at least to your face)

And nobody judged you because of your race.

And the Grump found that last part a dreadful disgrace.

*

The Grump was a creature with hands like mouse

But his butt and gut were as big as a house

His hair and his face were a bright shade of orange

(Let’s skip this next line, because what rhymes with orange?)

*

The Grump grumped alone in his frumpy Grump Tower,

Hungry for hamburgers, French fries… and power!

He announced, “I will make this lousy land great

“If you let me lead all you people I hate!

*

“I’ll build you a wall a thousand feet tall!

“And make the Who-spanics pay for it all!

“And if you need health care, you’ll get it from me.

“Forget those big bills – you can all die for free!”

*

His lied far and wide — the Grump couldn’t lose

Until Sleepy Joe Biden awoke from his snooze:

He yawned, “Here’s my platform: I am not the Grump.”

He won by a landslide! He thumped the Grump’s rump!

*

“I got zero votes!” the Grump grumped in distress.

He asked for a recount – and got even less.

“He won without violence! He won without shootin’!

“He won without cheating or lawsuits or Putin!”

*

The Whos mobbed the Grump with torches and axes.

“Don’t kill him,” said Biden.  “Just make him pay taxes.”

“No, kill me,” said the Grump.

%%footer%%