Leprechaun.

– So you’re sure that you’re not a Leprechaun?

– Yes, I’m sure!

– But babe, you haven’t taken off your tall green hat since the day we met.

– I’m bald.

– Oh god, I think I’m going to be sick.

– Look, I promise I’m not a Leprechaun, I just really like 19th century buckled shoes.

– You’re bald? When were you going to tell me?

– I… uh… I mean I guess was planning on it, but—

– Dating someone who’s bald is like living in hell.

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