True facts about fake wrestling.

Everyone’s favorite wrestler is Bone Crusher, but if you look at his birth certificate, his real name is Bone Helper. When he’s not pretending to wrestle, he works pro-bono at his dad’s chiropractic clinic.

The referees aren’t there to enforce rules. They got hired on as helpers to check in with the wrestlers and make sure they are okay with all of the lying.

The championship belt is real, but getting the belt is punishment for wrestlers who don’t finish their chores on time.  The loser has to wear the championship belt with the championship pants, which are uncomfortable dress pants they have to wear on Sundays.

Even though wrestling is fake, you should know that when the wrestlers lock arms, they secretly have a thumb war. At the end of the season, the wrestler with the most wins gets to pick out a movie.

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