A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, but a hand in the bird and you’ve got a puppet.
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Sarah Totton's humor has appeared at McSweeney's, Points in Case, Slackjaw, and Weekly Humorist, among others. She has won (dis)honorable mentions in the Bulwer Lytton, Lyttle Lytton, and Wergle Flomp contests.